ROLEPLAY 2

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GOSSIP By D. M. Larson from Freedrama.net for 5 actors
(2 m 3 f) (teen version)

Copyright © 2005, 2013

SCENE 1

(Play takes place in a makeshift school newspaper office. BULA sits at her desk facing the audience and SKEETER is sleeping under a table covered by newspapers)

BULA: Skeeeeeter! Where are you, boy?

SKEETER: [Crawls out from under a table] Yeah.

BULA: What you doin' down there?

SKEETER: Sleepin'.

BULA: Didn't you go home last night?

SKEETER: We had a deadline for the school paper. Pulled an all nighter.

BULA: So you got the paper done? Where is it?

SKEETER: [Looks] Shoot. I knew I forgot something.

BULA: Now, Skeeter....

SKEETER: Oowa, baby. The "Now Skeeter" talk.

BULA: We have an obligation to the people of this school to bring them news on a weekly basis. [SKEETER mouths the speech as he sits and listens] We are this town's ear to the world. They count on us to give them the news like no one else can... You listenin' to me, Skeeter? [He even mouths the last part]

SKEETER: Yes, ma'am.

BULA: How much of the paper we got done?

SKEETER: The front part's all done.

BULA: Then get it out there. The students are waiting.

SKEETER: [Mumbles to self] They all just love the school paper. They love to wipe their...[Exits before we hear what he is going to say]

BULA: Poor, Skeeter. This big time newspaper business is hard on the boy. [Looks through paperwork on desk] Now let's see. What do we have for next week's top story? Looks like we're down to two: Where is the school nurse sneaking off to during the day? Or who are the imaginary people the principal is always talking to?  Wow. Where do we ever get such good news? I'll bet no other school paper can boast about these kind of headlines.

Monte the hall monitor rushes in with a fake gun.

MONTE: [runs in, gun out] Hold it! Police!

BULA: Ah!

MONTE: [laughs] Hey, Bula.

BULA: You scared me half to death.

MONTE: I know. [snickers]

BULA: What you want, Monte?

MONTE: You still paying a buck each for my hall monitor reports?

BULA: A buck a story. Offer's still good.

MONTE: [proud] I've got five this week.

BULA: Five! That's a regular crime wave.

MONTE: You wouldn't believe what happens in these halls.  If this keeps up, I may have to ask for an assistant.

BULA: Wouldn't that be something? [makes a note] That's a story in itself.

MONTE: That's six bucks, then.

BULA: Fine. [Goes to purse] Six dollars. Don't you go spend that all in one place.

[Monte exits]

BULA: [sarcastic] Boy, do I feel safe knowin' he's around. [Types] Crime wave hits the halls of our school. Hide your valuables. Monte the Hall Monitor says we had a record number of incidents this week. He caught one group of kids playing with firecrackers and trying to blow up the chemistry lab.  He wrote over ten tickets for excessive farting in the gym. And rescued some guy from a locker that his girlfriend had stuffed in him.  He must have done something pretty bad.  Girl power gone wild.  This school is out of control. 

KILABREW: [enters] Bula? How's you feeling today?

BULA: Fine, fine. Here to bring me the school health report?

KILABREW: Certainly. Oh, my.

BULA: What?

KILABREW: [examines BULA] You been getting enough vitamin C?

BULA: I... I don't know...

KILABREW: YOU DON'T KNOW. Don't toy with your health, Bula. A healthy body is a temple for the gods.

BULA: I thought there was only one God?

KILABREW: You're so closed minded, Bula.

BULA: What you got for me, Kilabrew?

KILABREW: First, we have "This week's weight watch" by Nurse Nancy Kilabrew. 

BULA: You're not a nurse.  You're just a student assistant.

KILABREW: Whatever.  See, I weigh all the athletes and I thought that would be something everyone would enjoy reading about. Emma Rogers - gained 12 pounds. Patty May - lost 2 pounds. And a big congrats to Jane Graham - Lost 25 pounds. And our football team's star lineman of the year, Billy Joe Bugle - happily gained another 27 pounds on his way to a school record 324 pound.

BULA: Anything else?

KILABREW: Got some great baby names for you. I asked the art teacher, Mrs. Hicky, what she'd name her upcoming child. She has settled on naming the kid after her favorite snack: Goober if it's a boy.

BULA: And if it's a girl?

KILABEW: Raisinette.

BULA: Lovely.

KILABREW: That's six bucks.

BULA: Six? That's only two stories.

KILABREW: Four weight watchers and two baby names.

BULA: Five bucks then. The two names are for the same kid.

KILABREW: Fine. [BULA hands over $5] Oh, is that a bird I hear. Cheap, cheap, cheap.

BULA: You can go away now.

KILABREW: Cheap, cheap, cheap. [Exits]

FANNY: [appears at door] Can I come in, Bula?

BULA: Why if it ain't Fanny Mae Alcott? How is my favorite reporter today?

FANNY: [Excited] Favorite reporter? Oooh. That sounds good.

BULA: Well, you've been quite the news hounds lately.

FANNY: News hound. I like the sound of that too. The boys at school have always said I've been a dog.

BULA: [Raises an eyebrow] Well...uh, what you have for me today?

FANNY: Well, I was walkin' around looking for a story. I went out behind the boys locker room. I always go there hoping to... uh... talk with one of the boys. You know, interview 'em after the big game. And if they ever win a game, I'm gonna get the best darn interview. Losing don't make good news.

BULA: You got a point here, Fanny? I'm a busy lady.

FANNY: I do. See, I heard some of them boys talking in the locker room. They leave the window open cause it gets real hot in there. 

BULA: To the point, Fanny. A good reporter gets to the point.

FANNY: [Hands over a report] Anyway, I got this. Don't know if it's worth printin.'

BULA: This is good.

FANNY: You think so?

BULA: Top notch investigating.

FANNY: Gosh.

BULA: There's your dollar, darling. Enjoy.

FANNY: Wow. I feel just like Barbara Walters.

BULA: Keep it up and someday you just might be her.

FANNY: You really think so? I sure look up to her. Her and Jerry Springer.

BULA: They're the biggies.

FANNY: I'll see you tomorrow.

BULA: Keep 'em coming, Fanny Mae.

FANNY: I will. I'm headed over to the boys swimming hole. They got all kinds of interesting things going on over there.

BULA: This will do fine on the society page. [Sits at computer] Romance is a budding at the school. This week Jimmy Joe Johnson's heart is a palpitating for none other than Betty Sue Mall. Unfortunately he's feeling a bit shy and can't figure out a way to tell Betty he's got those special feelings for her. Don't you worry, though, Jimmy. She'll know all about it soon enough. Best wishes to both of you in this new found romance. Fanny Mae Alcott reporting.

END OF SCENE

ROLEPLAY 2014-2015

THE BOY WHO CRIED GENIE FROM FREEDRAMA.COM

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CAST OF CHARACTERS:1 male: Derrek5 females: Genie, Girl, Zombie, Woman [vampire], Jesi

INT. COMPUTER LAB. DAY.

DEREK, a cool, confident guy, enters the lab.  JESI, a shy, nerdy gal, looks like she wants to talk to him but can only manage a whisper. 

JESI

Hi.

Derek doesn't hear her and goes to a computer to start work.  Jesi rushes out all embarrassed.  Derek finds a cd stuck in the computer.  It comes out and it is glowing [Light shines on it].  He looks at it and rubs it.  A puff of smoke [fog machine] flows in and a Genie steps in with it.

GENIE

What do you want?

DEREK

What?  Who are you?

Derek lowers the cd and sees the Genie.  

GENIE

I'm a genie.

She waves her hands and more smoke appears.

DEREK

A genie?  So... does that mean I get three wishes?

GENIE

Yeah, yeah.   You know the drill.

DEREK

Cool.  Oh, I know what I want.  I want the perfect girl.

GENIE

As you wish...

Genie disappears into the smoke [exits] and GIRL appears, acting very young, licking a lollipop and jumping up and down excited.

GIRL

Hi, let's play.  

Derek turns looking for the Genie.

DEREK

No, no, no.  

Genie appears and makes GIRL disappear [exits]. 

GENIE

You did ask for a girl.

DEREK

I want someone much older than that.

GENIE

As you wish...  

Genie disappears [exits] and ZOMBIE appears. 

DEREK

Not that old!

Genie makes Zombie disappear [exits].  

GENIE

You're down to one wish... make it good.

DEREK

What?  Oh, man.  Okay.  I want the perfect woman is my age, beautiful and sharp.

GENIE

You got it.  

Genie disappears and a beautiful WOMAN appears.  She comes up to him and he smiles.  She crosses behind him.  She pushes back her hair and we see her pointed ears and she bares her fangs.

WOMAN

Want to neck?

Derek smiles big and turns and sees her fangs come at him.  He screams.

DEREK

Genie!

WOMAN disappears and Genie appears and sighs. 

DEREK (CONT.)

You ruined all my wishes!

GENIE

Wishes are not the key to your happiness.  

Genie disappears and Derek falls into a chair.  Jesi returns.  She nervously approaches Derek and touches him on the shoulder and he jumps.  

JESI

I'm sorry.  Have you seen my keys.

DEREK

Keys?

JESI

Here they are.

DEREK

Hey, what's your name?

JESI

Jesi.  And you're Derek.

DEREK

You work in the lab in the mornings huh?

JESI

Uh-huh.  You want my email?  In case you need to ask me something... about the lab. 

DEREK

No one ever comes in the lab during my shift.  You want to stay and hang out?  

JESI

Sure, I'd like that.

Genie appears on the computer screen and winks [this can be a video on a large computer screen or a projected image onto a screen - if neither of these are possible you can end on the above line].

JESI (CONT.)

What was that?

DEREK

Some computer virus.

JESI

I know this great anti-virus software... let me show you.  It works like magic.

END OF SCRIPT